do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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