people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Bring me that man meat
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize