I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
