be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
