Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Come on in and take your pants off
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
