I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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