Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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