He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
