He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
