bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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