Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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