i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize