No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
