State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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