Cold hands, warm shart.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
