I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
