Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
