love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
