Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Two words: blizzard sex
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
