I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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