The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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