Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
