I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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