Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
