i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
