is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
