This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
