omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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