I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
