Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
