Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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