I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just want nice things and good sex
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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