I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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