How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
