WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
