Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
