ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
