Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize