I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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