The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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