Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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