I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
