You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
