I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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