Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
