I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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