jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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