You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
