So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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