i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
