felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
